Hello world! Ok if life was that easy

By: hotgothgeek

Feb 11 2015

Category: Uncategorized

1 Comment

Ok, so maybe life is easy and I just have not found a way of making it my B****.  I feel like where ever you go someone is trying to screw you over, and not just because it will make them feel better, but because seeing you fail makes their sorry excuse of a life better.

I have this friend and amazing guy who cares about how people see him but is strong enough to stand his ground.  He knows I like my rock music and I love to read my fantasy novels, I am also very morbid in an EMO kind of way ( Don’t get me wrong I am a happy person – I just like dark stuff)  so any way, but even though I admitted to him that I have a very geeky side he does not find me weird or runs my believes down.  Then you get my family on law – I will call them the ghouls cause that is what they are.  They suck the life out of you and insulting a Vampire is just not on : ) Any way,  they take and take and take to the point where I want to run away.  But that would mean leaving the person I love ( I will refer to this person as (SLN), and how do you do that.  I know what you thinking – Just move – not that easy. Certain reasons is keeping the better half here and I do get it, but this is also starting to effect SLN to the point where mood swings and anger is like riding on a freaken roller coaster.  But nothing I say or do can help her.  I am so close to running and living my life stress free but can I really do that?

Being in a relationship means that you try and make things work, but what happens when you try but it seems one sided, that your life means nothing compare to the person you love’s messed up life.  SLN will not leave her family (yes lady luck was so generous to let me live with the ghouls) because guilt makes her stay, yet I am willing to stay in hell just to be with her.  Are we both compromising or am I a sucker for punishment.

Everyone tells me to move, talk to SLN, put myself first, but again I ask can you just give up on a relationship just like that?  Especially when the ghouls are the ones making our life so dam hard.

I HATE feeling this way, but find myself day dreaming of passion and desire and a happy home.

If anyone reads this and gets what I am saying  then give me your views on how to deal with this B****




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